Ape Culture - Michael Jackson Celebrity Adventure

Yes, you beat it to Mexico City, in hiding to save your Netherlanders. While there, you call your faux-friend Liz Taylor (soon to be a celebrity adventure) and she diagnoses your Percodan addiction. She sends you to Elton John's house because he is an expert in drugs and trauma. Too bad he can’t help you out of the closet.

The Jackson Family Honors are postponed. Five bodyguards come forward with stories about your doings with young boys. All your former friends (Diana Ross, David Geffen, Jackie Onassis, Oprah, Brooke) are suddenly all mum. No one is mounting the pulpit for you but Elizabeth Taylor (soon to be a celebrity adventure). Roseanne Barr speaks-out publicly against you.

Eventually, the family of the one boy settles with you for 15 to 20 million dollars and they drop the case. The police clear them of extortion charges. According to police, there doesn’t seem to be enough evidence and the boy is hesitant to testify.

You are not proven to be guilty but according to the FBI, you closely match the profile of a pedophile. For your information, here is the profile match points:

The Jackson Family Honors, a show for charity, gets back on track but Latoya is banned. You and Janet stay in hotels away from the rest of the family. At the last minute, you refuse to go on. Janet goes on but storms off before the end. All the audience's sarcasms have to be edited out. When the event is finally over, the cast and crew have to sue the family for non-payment. Rumor has it that the family has kept the charity money ….or maybe it was The Jackson Family Charity that we were all raising the money for?

Disney drops your Captain EO exhibit. You are sued for canceling your tour. Children’s Peace Organization sues you. Some rappers sue you for plagiarizing their songs. Why not, your plagiarize your own songs.

More Jackson Family Honors: Tito’s ex-wife Dee Dee is murdered in her boyfriends pool.

Your retrospective album HisStory comes out and make a giant non-splash. To defray bad press, you marry Lisa Marie, famous for her work as Elvis Presley's daughter. You marry her in the Dominican Republic without warning. You never touch her in public unless on a talk show when you're trying to prove something. You stiffly kiss her on awards shows. It looks fake to even amateur star-watchers. Lisa doesn’t even live with you. She lives in another house. Can it possibly last?