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The Coachella Music Festival

Indio, CA
April 27, 2003

By Nerdia & Julia Richardson

Ape Culture is soon to be uni-costal again when Coolia moves to LA this summer. Meanwhile, Coolia paid a visit to LA in April to solidify moving details and see some shows. During her weeklong stay, the gang went to see Maria McKee play at the Roxy (great!). They also went to the LA Book Fair and The Coachella Music Festival in Indio, CA.

Because Ape Culture didn’t want to miss either Coachella or the Book Fair, which were both two-day events occurring simultaneously in the LA area during the weekend of April 26, Nerdia and Coolia decided to do the Book Fair Saturday (to see the Rock Bottom Remainders, primarily) and Coachella on Sunday with Nerdia’s friend and co-worker Julia.

The Rock Bottom Remainders (comprised of famous authors and pop culture icons like the creator of the Simpsons, Matt Groening, horror blockbuster writer Stephen King, Scott Turow of the best selling legal thrillers, syndicated humor columnist Dave Barry, and novelist Amy Tan, among other lesser known wives and siblings) where bad. Hard to listen to actually, even with Ape Culture’s prejudice toward books and their writers. The show was two hours of bad covers of campy 60s songs like Wild Thing and its ilk. The only saving grace was a surprise appearance and mini-concert by Roger McGuinn of The Byrds. By the time the show was over, the crowd had thinned considerably. Stephen King didn’t show up…maybe this explains it. Err..probably not. Ape Culture knew they'd be bad. They just weren't prepared for how bad. Overall, the Book Fair was worthwhile: Carl Reiner was great and the seminars were good (despite annoying Q&As from angry writers in the audience); but the whole layout was way too crowded and it wasn’t possible to browse any books due to all the people crammed into the tents and walkways. It was suffocating-ly crowded…

The Rock Bottom Remainders (comprised of famous authors and pop culture icons like the creator of The Simpsons, Matt Groening, horror blockbuster writer Stephen King, Scott Turow of the best selling legal thrillers, syndicated humor columnist Dave Barry, and novelist Amy Tan, among other lesser known wives and siblings) where bad. Hard to listen to actually, even with Ape Culture’s prejudice toward books and their writers. The show was two hours of bad covers of campy 60s songs like Wild Thing and its ilk. The only saving grace was a surprise appearance and mini-concert by Roger McGuinn of The Byrds. By the time the show was over, the crowd had thinned considerably. Stephen King didn’t show up…maybe this explains it. Err..probably not. Ape Culture knew they'd be bad. They just weren't prepared for how bad. Overall, the Book Fair was worthwhile: Carl Reiner was great and the seminars were good (despite annoying Q&As from angry writers in the audience); but the whole layout was way too crowded and it wasn’t possible to browse any books due to all the people crammed into the tents and walkways. It was suffocating-ly crowded…

…which was precisely what was nice about the Coachella Music Fest. This was Nerdia’s first music festival and she was expecting something rowdy, hot and crowded. It was comparatively spacious and relaxing.

Coachella, a relatively new music festival hosted on an Indio, CA, polo field near Palm Springs, has gained much respect and popularity in its short lifetime. Some reviews actually refer to Coachella as the premier music festival in the country, the Kentucky derby of garage bands.

The palm-tree framed festival was arranged with two main stages and about three or four music tents, art tents and a film festival tent. With even the estimated 30,000 visitors a day, it never felt crowded unless you braved the near stages for a front row seat.

Because they slept in late and had to stand in line for a while through the comparatively lax security, they didn’t make it inside until 2pm for the Ben Folds show, which was amazing, not for Folds’ usual nutty, nerdy energy but because he wasn’t backed up in any way. It was just Ben and his piano. And he still managed to rock the crowd, even singing Nerdia’s favorite Ben Folds Five song as his opener, Best Imitation of Myself (although she missed again, for her second Ben Folds show, Eddie Walker). Ben did mostly standard fare otherwise, but also his recent cover of the Beatles’ Carry That Weight/Golden Slumbers.

From there, Julia, Coolia and Nerdia visited one of the DJ dance tents (to the left) to see DJ DB and Timo Maas. Good dancing but even better people watching. On the way out of the Timo Maas tent, they passed the Film Festival tent, which was too small and too hot so they skipped some interesting fare there. Unfortunate.

Coolia and Nerdia went off to watch Sonic Youth – and Mary fell asleep. (see view from Mary when she woke up - to the right.)

From there they all re-gathered to spend all their money on overpriced dinners, sitting in the shade to eat five dollar tofu masalas and drinking 2 dollar waters while listening to Jack Johnson play at a nearby stage. Nerdia complained that she was still starving at the end of dinner.

Julia split off from Nerdia and Coolia at this point. Nerdia and Coolia left to hear the remaining bands and Julia left to visit the art projects and remaining dance acts.

Nerdia and Coolia both found Primal Scream interesting and worthy of future investigation. Both thought The White Stripes were great. Nerdia was not a White Stripes fan before seeing the show and was blasé about them but found their live show to be jaw-dropping phenomenal, full of old school rock drama with some modern wink-wink thrown in. The simplicity of music and visuals made for a show stopping performance. Michigan rock lovers should be proud. It was one of the best shows of the day.

Iggy & The Stooges were next. Coolia and Nerdia agreed this show felt too much like homework. Aficionados, check your annoyance. The build up was historic; the result…eh.

After over another hour of standing in a packed horde, Nerdia and Coolia watched The Red Hot Chili Peppers close out the night. Coolia had seen them previously and promised a great show. Nerdia, although suffering severe pain and fatigue and annoyance at being bounced around in the near pit of boys making up most the crowd, loved the show. The Red Hot Chili Peppers are every bit as good live as everyone says.

Overall, good day of music and ubiquitous body piercings, happy stage chat from all the bands (the Peppers were surprisingly polite), and CD signings if you were willing to wait through the long lines.

The most difficult part of the day was getting out. Coachella provided only one small exit from the polo field and not enough exits from the parking lots. Expect to sit in the lots for an hour or two. You will be famished after a day of standing, walking, and overpaying for too little vittles. You will need to stop for a nosh once you get back on the road. Avoid the obvious drive-throughs and find the Quick-E-Mart for decent late night snack of cheesy poofs and soda.

Note: Had they visited the Saturday show at Coachella, they would not have missed The Beastie Boys, The Donnas, or The Hives. They also would not have missed the Gene Simmons signing books Sunday at the LA Book Fair. Alas. Life is choices.

Julia’s Coachellakus

Setting

Tents in the desert,
Set up for weekend nomads.
The wandering fools.

Free parking for all!
Leave your car in the field here.
Oh, but where is here?!

Lines were minimal
Entertainment was maximal.
What a treat for all!

Internet said no:
Outside food, blankets, and bags.
The internet lies!

So many T-shirts,
Catchy phrases and designs.
Can I choose just one?

Tampons for a buck
Sells Coachella general store.
A bargain really.

“White boy” T-shirts sold
To the white boys. Let’s
State the obvious.

The porto-potties
All in a straight row, create
Steamy horizons

The Arts & Crafts

Thirst in the desert.
Where is all the cactus?
Ah, the cactus cart!

Fireball soccer:
Played by the football rejects.
High school meant nothing.

Nerds build large robots,
Flame throwers and poor stage props.
Destruction only please.

Robots: Thousand bucks
Props on fire: Hundred bucks
Destruction: Priceless

Fake lightening strikes
As thirty thousand fans leave.
Odds of getting hit?

The “Mutaytors” drum
Up a tite beat and business.
Smart taters I say!

The art performers,
Shakin’ it half naked on stilts,
Mingling with the crowd.

The artists unite.
Art and fire entertain
Together as one.

Hula hoop is back,
And front and side and around.
A groovy talent

Lamp oil smoothie
Consumed by fire spitters.
Who’s Mutayting now?

Glow sticks mesmerize
Everyone dancing in the tents.
Not just for Halloween now.

The Music

The noise pollution
In the crystal clear desert
Music to my ears

Coachella music;
Rock, Rap, Trance, and, Espanol.
No asking for more.

One main stage rocks it,
One side stage moves grooves it,
Three tents trance dance it.

Three lone tents standing,
Thirty thousand dancers bounce.
Three million profit.

Dirty Vegas rocks
As if “Days go by” slowly.
So disappointed.

Pink hat wearing Ben
Folds five songs into just one.
Stages close together.

DB the DJ
Gets fans blood flowing quickly.
BJ for DB?

DB in a tent
Bumps high and low decibels.
Ear plugs for me…..ahhhh.

The Red Hot Chilis,
Anthony and Flea so cool.
No peppers exposed.

All Chili Peppers,
But not quite all the time.
A full hour late.

Sonic Youth wails on
While ten thousand watch the show
Except one sleeping.

Rap and Rock unite,
Spun by DJ C-Minus,
Oh, my head spins too.

Folk music is back
Jack talks of Jill’s bubbly toes
Julia’s toes bolt

Dinner

Concert food for sale!
Cold burgers and hot pop.
Only ten dollars!

The desert sun warms,
Everything at Coachella
Except the hot dogs

Four dollar hot dog
Makes your mouth water for food
Anything but that.

Read more of Ape Culture's concert reviews.

Post a comment about Coachella and over-priced concert festival food.

 

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